Modern dating comes with its own set of challenges, as I am sure you are aware. If you’ve been on (and off) of dating apps for more than a year, you can appreciate the struggle. As the search for belonging in another’s arms starts to feel more like a hustle, or a series of very bad business meetings, you may also find yourself lost in vocabulary, as you navigate this tremendously shakey water.
As more singletons flock to dating applications and speed-datesarus in the city in the hope of meeting their perfect mate, we do not only find ourselves fighting against the tide of the latest trending dating application filling up our iCloud storage, but we’ve actually reached a penultimate moment in dating history, we have even invented a language for our highlights, our pitfalls, and our dating disasters.
Trending dating words may have you scanning the forgotten pages of your own hopes, fears, and desires of the heart, but they are also a tool of great exploration. Through these words, we find new ways to articulate our periodical disappointments, and accomplishments.
So my darlings, in the quest to help you find the best, I have started my own exploration of the words we’ve invested in, the language that has taken its position in the undercurrents of finding nourishment for our need for love, the disposition that has us categorically seeking a soul connection and clogging up our phones with random messages and an ocean of “date me selfies”.
We’ll start with one of my favourites, pedastooling.
The act of placing someone you’re dating on a metaphoric pedastool
The assumption that someone you are dating is in fact, better than you
Believing the ego-centric words that another human shares with you, devotedly
Not believing enough in the fact that you are indeed, a true Goddess
You see pedastooling another can tell us two things.
You do not yet believe that you are a divine being that deserves the world that deserves the truest, deepest love
Point one needs to exist to understand point two - you see the light in another and believe they are too good for you, because you are unable to see your own
Pedastooling is a phenomenon I am all but too familiar with. As I’ve dated a few Phils and quite a few pigeons, I have now come to realise that, we have to take responsibility for fornicating with the wrong ones, for the lack of seeing our own true divinity.
This word has its place, but when the thought that another is better than you begins to seep into your loins, and your vocabulary, it may be time to take an internal reflection, followed by a date cancellation to take time to pour that love back inwards.
Until next time bessies